Moving On

Soooo, on Tuesday I wrote a blurb about Oscar's dad.

He found out Monday night from his sister. The grief he showed was more than I'd ever been exposed to before. I think Oscar lost part of himself. The future he had envisioned with his father will never take place.

Oscar planned to support his father, maybe even have his father live with us. He was planning a trip to Mexico with his father and expecting him to be there for his grandchildren. All that was lost. Forever. And there was guilt.

He could have done more. We all could have done more. Would that have saved him?

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So..... Oscar cried and prayed and went to work. He cried some more, talked to family, talked to friends. Spent time with family, saw his father's body, came home.

Tried to keep his mind off his loss and onto the positive things in his life.

And I have been there next to him, crying with him, holding him, being present.

The last few days have been ok. Oscar being able to cry and talk about it with multiple people seems to have really helped him. People telling him over and over that it's not his fault seems to help.

I think he will mourn his father for the rest of his life, and that's ok. His loss will pop into his head at moments his dad would have enjoyed and that's ok.

Ravi came and hung out with him all day long today. It sounded like a lot of fun. They played golf, went to the gym and played chess. I spent the day at my sister's creating a slideshow for the funeral. When I came home we hung out some more and then Ravi left and there is sadness. I do everything I can to get his mind off of it, but sometimes it is unavoidable. It comes creeping back throughout the day and is the elephant in the room.

Oscar's missing a part of him, and therefore I am missing a part of me. We both miss his Dad's quiet presence in our lives dearly.

Here's the slideshow I put together.